| Life is uncertian.... |
[06 Jan 2007|11:47pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 restless |
] |
Life is at a full exceleration but i do not see where it is heading and that uncertainty scares me. I found myself going back to years past this evening in hopes of finding some old roots to make me feel on solid ground again, but instead im even more upheaveled. Matt Aragon was a friend to me in my deepest hours through early highschool, but i havnt seen or talked to him in ages. However, i still felt like i should start there. Well to my dismay and joy i read he is getting married and moving away! i am so happy for my old friend but sad to see him go and even more torn that we lost our friendship along our travels. We are both still young and plenty of time but i am afraid things would seem forced or diferent if i were to try and mend old bonds. Never the less i am happy for him and am i for all my friends who find joy/love/calm peace etc.
I am on the fast track to becoming a chef, going to school full time, working full/overtime and still finding that time to plan the family vacation to hawaii!!! wooohooo!!! (Feb 17-27th) but still each day i wake up with out any long view of the future, each day is as unforseen to me as 20 years to someone else (if that makes any sense) I talk more later, its late and i have to be up earlie as usual. G'nite, and matt if u ever find your way to this, Good bless you and S.
|
(1 limerick | inscribe)
|
| walls fall |
[18 Nov 2005|11:01pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 contemplative |
] |
It has been so long since i wrote down my thoughts, seems like every few months i get the desire to vent to a void of space. But this void of space always listens, and never tells me im wrong, or gives me any adivce really at all, and you know that is nice sometimes.
I've built a wall a year ago, and every day since i have done nothing but add more bricks to that ever growing wall....a few weeks ago that wall fell, and i tried hopelessly to brace it with all my might, but i fell down anyways. She is amazing and she makes my heart race, and butterflies tickle my every single fiber. she is so much more than all that. I have found someone who shares so many of the same goals in life, vaules and desires... she cpativates and stimulates me on a mental level that i've never experianced...and if all this wasnt enough i feel so at home around her, like i dont have to wine and dine her, but it makes it all the sweeter that thats all i want to do...to take her everywhere she could ever possibly want to go..............there is only one problem, she has a wall too, and hers hasnt fallen, she wont open up, and for all certainty i have no real clue if she feels the same way as even a part of what i feel....i just want her to tell me she has fallen for me too, that she wants a relationship with me....that she wants ME....i told her some girls are just worth fighting for, but sometimes it feels good to be wanted back...i want her to want me as i want to be near her....
|
(1 limerick | inscribe)
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=88.8){kind=small}
redsand550's journal